At the Clubhouse, Part Two
The Summer Prompt
my_cnnr

EXT - FRONT YARD OF THE MRF HOUSE - AFTERNOON

The sun is full and high.  A long line of Macedonian Soldiers leads, in one direction, up and onto the verandah, and in the other, down the walk, through (not around) the garden, across the grass, finally disappearing into the distance.  Along the line, Macedonian Army Clerks are busy.  Some carry clipboards and are writing on small squares of paper, others are handing each Soldier one of the marked slips.  Perdikkas, scowling, patrols the line.  A few small clusters of Characters stand watching and talking quietly to each other, falling silent as Perdikkas passes.

A wicker table has been placed on the verandah, to one side of the front door.  Behind it are seated TRUE RIVER and THE SECRETARY.  The Macedonians file past the table, through the open front door and on through the house.  Each hands, as they pass, their square of paper to True River.  She reads it aloud to The Secretary, who marks a line on a legal pad in front of her.  Both True River and The Secretary seem somewhat resigned.

ALEXANDER stands at the other side of the door.  He is looking kingly and charming—flashing some of his his most dazzling smiles at the men as they pass, at True River and The Secretary if they happen to glance over, or at anyone else who passes.

HEPHAISTION and RALPH are sitting off in a far corner of the verandah, legs stretched out in front of them.  They watch as a small commotion occurs along the line.  Mr. Straike, accompanied by Lucy and Olive, has beckoned Perdikkas to the garden.  Mr. Straike points to the remains of some trampled petunias.  Perdikkas scowls, shrugs and stomps off, leaving Mr. Straike talking to air.  Ralph and Hephaistion both smile.

RALPH
(nods slightly in the direction of Alexander, who, hands on hips, is now gazing regally off into the distance)
That’s your boyfriend.

HEPHAISTION
Indeed it is.  Gets the job done, though, doesn’t he?

RALPH
(peers over his shoulder at the long line of men still off in the distance, laughs)
Quite.
(pauses)
Why, though?  For a story prompt?

HEPHAISTION
Oh—it’s not about him getting his way.  This time.  Well—it is, kind of.  The Boy asked….

RALPH
(brow)
I can imagine.

HEPHAISTION
…and he said “yes” without thinking and here we are.

RALPH
(laughs)
Yes.  Here, watching Greek democracy in action.

HEPHAISTION
(grins)
Maybe.  Not quite.  Erm … a benign tyranny, perhaps.  Let’s just hope Aristotle doesn’t get wind of—

(He stops to watch as Alexander strikes a particularly Buzz Lightyear-esque pose, and then waits for it to be admired.) Gods, will you look at that….

Cut to The Secretary and True River.

TRUE RIVER
(reading each slip as it is handed to her by a Soldier)
Spangled Loincloth.  Spangled Loincloth.  Spangled Loincloth.

THE SECRETARY
(sighs)
How many more are there?

TRUE RIVER
(her eyes following the line of men)
I don’t really know.  A few hundred, maybe?  Perhaps more.  Enough that I can’t see the end of the—oh no!  I hope they’re not in the neighbour’s yard again.  Those poor Jane Duncan ladies—they were really quite kind about that unfortunate incident last year with the boars.  They don’t have them in their books, you know.  Boars, I mean.  Caused quite an uproar amongst their readers.

That’s five more “Spangled Loincloths” if you’re still counting….

MY_CNNR enters through the front door, pushing against the line of Soldiers.  She pulls the door closed behind her, stopping their progress.  There is a little bumping and shuffling as the line is brought to an unexpected halt.  She faces Alexander, who has struck yet another pose and is gazing nobly in the other direction.

MY_CNNR
Really, Alexander?  For a Summer Prompt?  You want “Spangled Loincloth” so badly that you call out the Army?

ALEXANDER
(vogues)

MY_CNNR
This isn’t about the Summer Prompt, is it?  It’s about your bl___y book not getting a glossary and I’m really sorry that no one took it on, and I hope someone eventually offers to write one and there was already one in there anyway, so how many times do we have to apologise?  You got a movie!  No one else has a movie.  Two, in fact.  Theseus was a Hero, but did he get a movie?  No.  You have two.

ALEXANDER
(motions to the Soldier at the front of the line who opens the door and proceeds through.  The entire line, and the voting, begins again)

MY_CNNR
Fine.  Fine!  We surrender.  You win.  Spangled Loincloth it is.  That should go over well….  You can call off Perdikkas and the boys … but not before you do something about Olive’s petunias….

***

So.  There it is.  Alexander-girls (and guys), he’s your boyfriend.  Which means your Summer Prompt is “Spangled Loincloth”.  Have at it.

As for the rest of us, the prompt is “Summer Clothes”.  Worn, mentioned, removed … whatever you like—the exact words don’t have to appear.  Post independently, when you’re ready, with Summer Prompt 2011 in the header, please.  In by, say, the end of August.  OK?  August 2011, that is.  ;)

Except that….

Well—I think I’d pay good money to read a fic in which Ralph Lanyon uses the words “spangled loincloth” in context.

Just sayin’.

These interviews, conversations, and stories are written purely for entertainment, and as a tribute to the creator of the characters and author of The Charioteer, Mary Renault.   No copyright infringe­ment is intended.

“At the Clubhouse, Part Two—The Summer Prompt” was originally posted to the maryrenaultfics community, 30 July 2011, by my_cnnr.